As my faithful (or bored) readers know I recently got a CPAP machine. I just got the insurance bill. The friggin' health insurance that I pay into won't pay for it, though my doctor says that I need it. The most they'll pay for health equipment is peanuts, leaving me with two grand for my very own. Friggin' jackasses.
This is what I love about health insurance. You get it, you pay into it and it still doesn't help you when you need it.
Happily, I do get to act out my frustration at work. I'm now the anonymous 'Jack', head of software development. A perpetually harried and annoyed character that gets to snap at the idiotic headhunters that cold call us with what we don't want or need.
It's very freeing.
April 22, 2008
April 21, 2008
One Annoying Problem with Sleeping Better...
Clearly, I'm dreaming again... So far there've been two nights, where I was able to take off the CPAP mask or otherwise disconnect myself from the machine the first time unplugging the hose (though that might have been something as simple as rolling over too far and popping it out), but last night was different. I went to bed with the machine fully connected and the machine on, but I woke up this morning with the water reservoir half-way full, the mask neatly coiled in the dresser drawer like I usually put it in the morning and the CPAP machine turned off. I'm not sure if it was fully unhooked, but I think it was.
Unfortunately, no memory at all of doing any of that. If my subconscious made itself half as useful and would take up the slack with its share of the chores around the apartment, things would be so much easier. Though I don't think there's a listing for someone that sleep-cleans rather than sleep-walking.
Unfortunately, no memory at all of doing any of that. If my subconscious made itself half as useful and would take up the slack with its share of the chores around the apartment, things would be so much easier. Though I don't think there's a listing for someone that sleep-cleans rather than sleep-walking.
April 16, 2008
Clownitis Strikes!
Ryan has it worst. But as you can see Conall, has the bug as well. I would imagine that the whole house will be down with a bad case by the end of the week. Hopefully, the usual therapy of seltzer bottles and oversized shoes will work.
Wednesday Night at the Circus
This brings me back. I feel like a kid again. (Okay, this me, so that's only going back days or weeks.)
April 7, 2008
Sunday School Thoughts
Sunday was strange.
I started the process toward joining the Arlington Street Church, here in Boston. It was weird to be going to Sunday School at this point in my life. And weird to try to fit Unitarian Universalism into my understanding of 'church' from my more hierarchical Roman Catholic upbringing. To say that they're more than a little different doesn't begin to cover it.
A few things are the same though... The senior minister sat down with all of the new people in the class. She said that knowing her congregation is the only way that she knows how to minister, which reminded me a lot of the way my old parish priest would always be there to talk to his flock. The group talked about our faith and what brought us to Arlington Street and finally to the class. It was strange to hear the ministers talking about being called to preach. Maybe it's because I'm agnostic enough to not be sure about whether a deity (or deities) exists, I can't really understand someone that had utter confidence and belief in such a calling.
One of the things that really made me feel better about myself and my own struggles was learning that Mother Theresa had doubts throughout her life. I mean, I'm no Mother Theresa, but knowing that she had doubts and quite probably days when she wanted to pack it all in has really helped me keep my life in perspective.
For me, my beliefs turn more to believing in the innate goodness of mankind and a belief that we can make things better for everyone/everything. Maybe not solve all of the problems, but even easing someone else's day certainly counts as a win. I want to believe that there's an afterlife, but because I can't be sure, I believe that this is your one chance at getting it right. Maybe it flows from that or maybe because my own nature is largely ambivalent and doubting, I don't think I've ever made a decision in my life that I haven't second or third guessed. So the concept of an external imposed calling seems so alien that I can't really wrap my mind around it.
Of course, part of that is probably my reading of the words. If you think about it, a call to serve doesn't have to be external. I guess it could just as easily be a belief that that's where you'll be able to do the most good. And as such, that's the same as anyone moving toward a career. Of course, I doubt that's the way that they'd see it.
Okay, there's my maudlin post for the day. Time to go back to my mass market paperback book.
I started the process toward joining the Arlington Street Church, here in Boston. It was weird to be going to Sunday School at this point in my life. And weird to try to fit Unitarian Universalism into my understanding of 'church' from my more hierarchical Roman Catholic upbringing. To say that they're more than a little different doesn't begin to cover it.
A few things are the same though... The senior minister sat down with all of the new people in the class. She said that knowing her congregation is the only way that she knows how to minister, which reminded me a lot of the way my old parish priest would always be there to talk to his flock. The group talked about our faith and what brought us to Arlington Street and finally to the class. It was strange to hear the ministers talking about being called to preach. Maybe it's because I'm agnostic enough to not be sure about whether a deity (or deities) exists, I can't really understand someone that had utter confidence and belief in such a calling.
One of the things that really made me feel better about myself and my own struggles was learning that Mother Theresa had doubts throughout her life. I mean, I'm no Mother Theresa, but knowing that she had doubts and quite probably days when she wanted to pack it all in has really helped me keep my life in perspective.
For me, my beliefs turn more to believing in the innate goodness of mankind and a belief that we can make things better for everyone/everything. Maybe not solve all of the problems, but even easing someone else's day certainly counts as a win. I want to believe that there's an afterlife, but because I can't be sure, I believe that this is your one chance at getting it right. Maybe it flows from that or maybe because my own nature is largely ambivalent and doubting, I don't think I've ever made a decision in my life that I haven't second or third guessed. So the concept of an external imposed calling seems so alien that I can't really wrap my mind around it.
Of course, part of that is probably my reading of the words. If you think about it, a call to serve doesn't have to be external. I guess it could just as easily be a belief that that's where you'll be able to do the most good. And as such, that's the same as anyone moving toward a career. Of course, I doubt that's the way that they'd see it.
Okay, there's my maudlin post for the day. Time to go back to my mass market paperback book.
April 2, 2008
CPAP - Review
First a note to the pervs out there, the teenaged girl wasn't in my bed. She was in the guest room.
Now that that's over with, the CPAP machine. I've been using it since Thursday night — about a week now. I'm feel better rested, more awake during the day, I haven't felt the need for caffeine since I started using it. I also find that I have a lot more energy. I'm not ready to roll over and go to bed at 9:30pm any more. I can do more than be a lump on the couch after work, which has resulted in me going to the gym more (okay, twice so far) and other things.
I do find myself waking up at odd times during the night, when I roll over an the mask shifts and the CPAP machine blows air into my face or my eyes. Unsurprisingly, that's enough to wake me up.
But other than that, I'm feeling much much better.
Go CPAP.
Now that that's over with, the CPAP machine. I've been using it since Thursday night — about a week now. I'm feel better rested, more awake during the day, I haven't felt the need for caffeine since I started using it. I also find that I have a lot more energy. I'm not ready to roll over and go to bed at 9:30pm any more. I can do more than be a lump on the couch after work, which has resulted in me going to the gym more (okay, twice so far) and other things.
I do find myself waking up at odd times during the night, when I roll over an the mask shifts and the CPAP machine blows air into my face or my eyes. Unsurprisingly, that's enough to wake me up.
But other than that, I'm feeling much much better.
Go CPAP.
March 28, 2008
CPAP a go go
Well, yesterday, I had my appointment with the sleep people. I found out that I had severe sleep apnea. According to their charts, I stop breathing 72+ times a night. (It's a wonder that I ever feel rested sleeping.)
They got me a cool CPAP machine that I slept with for the first time last night. It seemed to do the job and I woke up at 5 or so this morning feeling fantastic. (Not Michael Jackson sleeping in a hyperbaric chamber, but still good none the less.)
Friends visiting this week. Once I drag a teenaged girl out of bed, it's Salem for us.
They got me a cool CPAP machine that I slept with for the first time last night. It seemed to do the job and I woke up at 5 or so this morning feeling fantastic. (Not Michael Jackson sleeping in a hyperbaric chamber, but still good none the less.)
Friends visiting this week. Once I drag a teenaged girl out of bed, it's Salem for us.
March 24, 2008
Closed on Easter?
My friend, Kiki and I went to the Copley Mall yesterday only to find it largely closed. The same was found when we went to the Prudential Mall. Yes, yesterday was Easter.
However, when did Easter get raised to become a National Holiday?
I thought that if the US had one stated religion it was Capitalism more than anything else. What the hell?
However, when did Easter get raised to become a National Holiday?
I thought that if the US had one stated religion it was Capitalism more than anything else. What the hell?
March 19, 2008
Bible on Homosexuality
Saw a link to this Pro-Gay/Anti-Gay article about the bible... Interesting...
Damn, I've done a lot...
I recently got an old friend from high school and he asked what I've been doing. And I got one of those rare moments of looking back on the last twenty-five years of your life and looking at what you've done.
Not to get maudlin, but I've really been blessed. I've seen a lot, met a lot of people, been in a lot of places and had a lot of fun.
Who knew that taking a measure of things once in a while would be so rewarding. Sure there are things that I wish I had done -- or not done as is more often the case -- but on a whole, I don't think I'd change much. And it feels damned good to be able to say that.
Thanks.
Not to get maudlin, but I've really been blessed. I've seen a lot, met a lot of people, been in a lot of places and had a lot of fun.
Who knew that taking a measure of things once in a while would be so rewarding. Sure there are things that I wish I had done -- or not done as is more often the case -- but on a whole, I don't think I'd change much. And it feels damned good to be able to say that.
Thanks.
March 17, 2008
Day 2 - Figuring Out What's Missing
Okay, the worst thing is the feeling of violation, but I'm even more pissed off about all the stupid shit that's gone...
Yes, I can understand why the thief liked my cashmere scarf. I liked it, too, which is why I purchased it. But why take all my Spring/Fall jackets? Why take my cargo pants? Why take my laundry bag? Especially, when you're already taking duffel bags and backpacks. Why take my shoes, when yours are half a size bigger than mine? Why open a bottle of shampoo? Why just throw it back on the furniture after you open it?
Why leave your clothes?
I'm sure it's going to be several days where I reach for something to wear or go to use something that's not there and get pissed, but in the big scheme of things, it's not the end of the world. Still pisses me off, though.
Update: And the hits keep coming... I should have realized it when the laundry bag was gone, but he took several pairs of pants, shirts, etc... I'm sure that when I finish doing the laundry he left, I'll find a host of unmatched sox and the like.
Yes, I can understand why the thief liked my cashmere scarf. I liked it, too, which is why I purchased it. But why take all my Spring/Fall jackets? Why take my cargo pants? Why take my laundry bag? Especially, when you're already taking duffel bags and backpacks. Why take my shoes, when yours are half a size bigger than mine? Why open a bottle of shampoo? Why just throw it back on the furniture after you open it?
Why leave your clothes?
I'm sure it's going to be several days where I reach for something to wear or go to use something that's not there and get pissed, but in the big scheme of things, it's not the end of the world. Still pisses me off, though.
Update: And the hits keep coming... I should have realized it when the laundry bag was gone, but he took several pairs of pants, shirts, etc... I'm sure that when I finish doing the laundry he left, I'll find a host of unmatched sox and the like.
March 16, 2008
Robbed!
First off, let's insert some gratuitous and much needed profanities.
Once that's done... We're ready to discuss it.
Was away for the weekend. A visit out to Western Mass to spend time with the family. Actually, had a lot of fun. Played with my nephews and nieces wandered around the mall, got some stuff out of storage, and generally had fun.
Came back home to find change spilled all over the floor in my bedroom. (Was a little confused by this. Dropped the bags and looked around. All the drawers were opened, and it looked like everything had been rifled through. Went next door to check with the landlord -- had my roommate mentioned anything about our being robbed? Nope, and she just talked with him the other day. She promised to send over her husband, the cop.)
We looked around, he had me call 911 and then I got to spend some time with the police officer that came to take my statement and then the detectives that showed up to dust for prints.
Basically, as far as I could piece together. My roommate went out to a bar and picked up someone that didn't look skeevy. They came back to the apartment, had an enjoyable evening and then had breakfast in the morning. My roommate went back to bed. His friend hung out in the living room, watching TV. When my roommate woke up, his new friend was gone.
Gone, but not forgotten. He'd helped himself to some clothes in my room, money that I had lying around, my portable DVD player, some prescription drugs that I had, some jewlery, my old Palm, and a backpack. On the other hand, he was nice enough to leave me his clothes. So I guess he considered that a nice trade. Though I think my Doc Martens, my leather jackets, etc... were a little bit better than his work boots, chino's and sweater.
The best I can say is that all my really expensive stuff: the MacBook, the iPod, my digital camera, the cell phone, and my current Palm were all with me out in Western Mass, so it wasn't as bad as it could have been. It still annoys the living crap out of me, but it wasn't as bad as it could have been and no one got hurt.
I'll have a chat with my roommate tomorrow and we'll try to get this sorted out. I'll start cleaning things up, because I've got guests coming in this weekend and all next week.
Once that's done... We're ready to discuss it.
Was away for the weekend. A visit out to Western Mass to spend time with the family. Actually, had a lot of fun. Played with my nephews and nieces wandered around the mall, got some stuff out of storage, and generally had fun.
Came back home to find change spilled all over the floor in my bedroom. (Was a little confused by this. Dropped the bags and looked around. All the drawers were opened, and it looked like everything had been rifled through. Went next door to check with the landlord -- had my roommate mentioned anything about our being robbed? Nope, and she just talked with him the other day. She promised to send over her husband, the cop.)
We looked around, he had me call 911 and then I got to spend some time with the police officer that came to take my statement and then the detectives that showed up to dust for prints.
Basically, as far as I could piece together. My roommate went out to a bar and picked up someone that didn't look skeevy. They came back to the apartment, had an enjoyable evening and then had breakfast in the morning. My roommate went back to bed. His friend hung out in the living room, watching TV. When my roommate woke up, his new friend was gone.
Gone, but not forgotten. He'd helped himself to some clothes in my room, money that I had lying around, my portable DVD player, some prescription drugs that I had, some jewlery, my old Palm, and a backpack. On the other hand, he was nice enough to leave me his clothes. So I guess he considered that a nice trade. Though I think my Doc Martens, my leather jackets, etc... were a little bit better than his work boots, chino's and sweater.
The best I can say is that all my really expensive stuff: the MacBook, the iPod, my digital camera, the cell phone, and my current Palm were all with me out in Western Mass, so it wasn't as bad as it could have been. It still annoys the living crap out of me, but it wasn't as bad as it could have been and no one got hurt.
I'll have a chat with my roommate tomorrow and we'll try to get this sorted out. I'll start cleaning things up, because I've got guests coming in this weekend and all next week.
March 13, 2008
Night of the Sleep Study
And boy did I look like a dork.The good news is that we have some results already. The nurse was really nice and friendly as she strapped me in and applied all the sensors. She was also nice enough to take this picture for me.
She said that they had until 3am to decide whether I had sleep apnea. The fact that she came in before midnight to get me a CPAP mask answered any questions that I had about whether I had sleep apnea. She said it was really bad and that anyone that heard me could tell that I had sleep apnea.
They initially tried just a nose mask, but that didn't work much with my stuffed up nose and forty odd years of mouth-breathing. About twenty minutes later, she was back with a nose/mouth mask. I was breathing through that and though it dried the hell out of me, it did seem to work.
Initially, I had some trouble sleep and woke up several times. I had odd feelings about being shocked and zapped by the sensors at the beginning, but the nurse assured me that that couldn't happen and that I must have been dreaming. After I got the CPAP machine, I slept much more thoroughly. This could mean that I'll snore less and be much more awake and alert in my day to day life, when I get one of my own.
We'll see.
Update: And what's up with the education video that shows everyone with sleep apnea looking like Louie Anderson after a month long Ben & Jerry's eat-a-thon? If I didn't know that a thin person that I knew had sleep apnea, I would be feeling pretty fat after watching that.
March 12, 2008
Sleep Study Tonight
I've been off my allergy meds for a few days, so that I'll be able to be tested at worst case. And frankly I'm absolutely miserable. I think all I need now is a ragweed corsage to make this worse.
I'm looking forward to finding out if I have sleep apnea.
I'm looking forward to finding out if I have sleep apnea.
March 6, 2008
A couple of months in...
Okay, I've been back for a couple of months now.
Settling in, still having the same problems that I always have about balancing life and work, which usually means that life falters and more time goes into work. I'm not quite into the same routine that I had when I was in London with weekly visits to gaming and comic stores — mostly because I'm trying to stay away from them and getting some money in the bank that way.
Still need to get plugged into Ashmont a little more, or at the very least, using Peapod rather than massive trips to Trader Joe's and living off of frozen Mexican food and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for a couple of weeks. Granted, I eat out too much: eggs or a toasted bagel from the place by work and lunch from somewhere around there, as well. Dinner and weekends are really the only times that I cook. I miss having a well-stocked grocery store next to the office where I could nip in for some sliced mangos or pineapple whenever I had a craving.
Trying to go to the gym more. I was good for a few weeks of scheduling a M, W, F standing two pm gym appointment. Then work got crazy and deadlines and... The gym slipped down on the priority queue. Right now I'm trying to get into a before work (made it once so far) or after work (made it once so far) schedule. We'll see how that goes and more importantly, how I can keep from being one of those people that the gyms love: I give them money and don't use their equipment.
I finally moved the bulk of my stuff from storage in Western Mass to my apartment. So I have a futon for guests, a desk, books, CDs and games all set up. (Which is a good thing, because I've got visitors coming from Kansas City later this month.) There are still some boxes and I've got some plastic tubs that make a maze of getting to the closet in the office, but for the most part I'm almost ready for guests.
Need to write more, mostly because I keep getting distracted from projects with other projects. Ie; novel put down, so I can work on a short story for my niece, which makes me one to write something for other kids and then I need to... I'm sure you've seen the cascading excuses procrastination tree in your own life.
Hopefully, I'll get some time to just disappear and work on some of my own stuff soon. Of course, that might take winning the lottery and being able to build a moat.
Settling in, still having the same problems that I always have about balancing life and work, which usually means that life falters and more time goes into work. I'm not quite into the same routine that I had when I was in London with weekly visits to gaming and comic stores — mostly because I'm trying to stay away from them and getting some money in the bank that way.
Still need to get plugged into Ashmont a little more, or at the very least, using Peapod rather than massive trips to Trader Joe's and living off of frozen Mexican food and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches for a couple of weeks. Granted, I eat out too much: eggs or a toasted bagel from the place by work and lunch from somewhere around there, as well. Dinner and weekends are really the only times that I cook. I miss having a well-stocked grocery store next to the office where I could nip in for some sliced mangos or pineapple whenever I had a craving.
Trying to go to the gym more. I was good for a few weeks of scheduling a M, W, F standing two pm gym appointment. Then work got crazy and deadlines and... The gym slipped down on the priority queue. Right now I'm trying to get into a before work (made it once so far) or after work (made it once so far) schedule. We'll see how that goes and more importantly, how I can keep from being one of those people that the gyms love: I give them money and don't use their equipment.
I finally moved the bulk of my stuff from storage in Western Mass to my apartment. So I have a futon for guests, a desk, books, CDs and games all set up. (Which is a good thing, because I've got visitors coming from Kansas City later this month.) There are still some boxes and I've got some plastic tubs that make a maze of getting to the closet in the office, but for the most part I'm almost ready for guests.
Need to write more, mostly because I keep getting distracted from projects with other projects. Ie; novel put down, so I can work on a short story for my niece, which makes me one to write something for other kids and then I need to... I'm sure you've seen the cascading excuses procrastination tree in your own life.
Hopefully, I'll get some time to just disappear and work on some of my own stuff soon. Of course, that might take winning the lottery and being able to build a moat.
March 2, 2008
Packages from the UK
I sent an enormous amount of packages from the UK to the US over the last couple of years. Whenever the stack of comics was too high, send them home. When I moved back, everything had to go.
One package recently made it to my brother's house. It was sealed in plastic and duct tape and looked as though it had been broken apart more than once.
I opened it today. Inside were my comics, a couple of tee-shirts to pad the box and a floral dressing gown for a man that would have made me seem tiny.
As I've never owned one of those, I was sort of at a loss. Obviously, several boxes were broken together. And seeing the tee-shirts, the postal worker, or sailer on the cargo ship, naturally thought that the dressing gown was mine, too.
Oddness.
One package recently made it to my brother's house. It was sealed in plastic and duct tape and looked as though it had been broken apart more than once.
I opened it today. Inside were my comics, a couple of tee-shirts to pad the box and a floral dressing gown for a man that would have made me seem tiny.
As I've never owned one of those, I was sort of at a loss. Obviously, several boxes were broken together. And seeing the tee-shirts, the postal worker, or sailer on the cargo ship, naturally thought that the dressing gown was mine, too.
Oddness.
March 1, 2008
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